46 year old Teresa, an empty nest mom found herself alone and lost when her soul mate husband suddenly died in late 2005. She had a very busy professional career. She had taken the jobs she thought were best, with no real concern for what she wanted, and worked long and hard to succeed. She found herself in a rut.
Stretching For What Truly Matters
When pushed to stretch for “what most mattered to her”, she added that she wanted to wake up in the morning and be excited about what she will do the rest of the day. But right now she wasn’t . She was struggling with “where I am and what do I want to do.” She was feeling “stuck.”
The conversation between the coach and Teresa:
Coach : What wasn’t working well for you?
All my life I had focused on the family and career. She said “as a baby boomer I had always focused on what others wanted, but never on what I wanted.”
Coach: What’s was it that stopped you from not achieving your goals.
She said she simply felt she could never think about her needs.
Coach: What’s important to you at the moment?
“I want to stop and take time out for myself now. I realize it’s my turn now.
Clarifying A Vision of Desired Results
On being asked , “how would your life be transformed if you changed this right now?” Are you standing in your power or still wanting to pleasing someone else?
She thought for a while, her face resting on her hand and smiled back at me as if she saw a ray of hope of changing her thought process.These questions seem to set her thinking. Teresa with a glint in her eyes said, “You allowed and encouraged me to look inside myself for the first time in my life, without guilt and with total focus and clarity. The vision of doing something that I love and doing it for my own self.”
Teresa conveys, “When my coach questioned me, “What are you passionate about?” “What are you willing to endure to see your goal become a reality?” “If you weren’t holding anything back, what would you be doing.”
I discovered that my true passion was to create costumes for early English life periods.”
She included an intangible sense of “comfort,” a sense of belonging in that place, of being able to create something that she always desired to. She also envisioned herself becoming a well-regarded member of the local community and creating a thriving, meaningful business.
She found it difficult, at first, not to let herself be overwhelmed by the brilliance of her newly crafted vision. However, with life coaching help, she faithfully followed the life design process, step by step.
Clarifying Current Reality
The change started, the chain of small steps begun.
Now as Teresa took her first steps into her new goal she became aware of few things, first considerations that she will have to work twice as hard and that she will have to make an effort to market her product.
What are the stoppers in taking action?
Some fears like fear of rejection, fear of failures are setting in.
Action Steps: Create and Adjust, Create and Adjust
What would be the most helpful thing that you could do now?
She said, “I need to start believing in myself and may be I need to research where to get cheap raw material from?”
Much of what she found out didn’t help her. She made mistakes, fixed them, and carried on.
Undaunted, determined to make her vision a reality, and emboldened by our personal success coaching sessions.
The Awesome Power of Passion, Practice and Perseverance:
Teresa worked on her dream with passion, never giving up. She said, “I engaged my life coach to discover my true “life calling” and get my ideal set up of life as such. My coach was “able to bring clarity to my situation, and sometimes help me see the obvious. I accomplished my goal of decreasing stress by finding life balance. I gathered myself and started doing something that is more in tune with who I am and my personal goals. My accomplishments actually meant getting my life, health and peace back. I had been totally consumed by work, by thinking about everyone else other than me. It was unhealthy in every way.”
And more importantly she explains, “My coach awakened me to discover the practical and realistic steps to actually turn my dream as a designer and producer of period costumes, into reality, based on ME! I discovered my breakthrough goal, something that brought new opportunities.”
Key takeaways !
Crafting a clear, compelling vision, then living that vision in reality, and taking action, step by step, you too, perhaps with a little personal success coaching-can transcend complexity and make way to your goal in spite of the circumstances and problems you face.
With practice, you might find yourself living out your dreams with the same kind of boldness that Teresa lived hers. You too might discover the genius, power, and magic that come from mastering your own creating process.
Jas signing off till next time !